From the pages of Off Center Magazine, May 2011 edition – CCSU
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From the pages of Off Center Magazine, May 2011 edition – CCSU
It’s called “Oh, ohh, ohhh! Female Pleasure, Desire and Orgasms” and it’s just one of the workshops sex educator Megan Andelloux offers and now her sassy presentation are causing a stir in Connecticut.
Anthony Cannella, a Central Connecticut State University associate professor who criticized Megan’s presentation at the unversity said: “I think it’s a lot of pandering and unnecessary titillation. I don’t think kids need any more encouragement than they already have. It’s sort of irresponsible in my view. It’s really disingenuous to say that it’s mainly education.”
Megan Andelloux is a nationally Certified Sexuality Educator (CSE) through The American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists, an HIV educator and a Board Certified Sexologist through The American College of Sexologists. For more on Megan, visit www.ohmegan.com.
PLEASE NOTE: I misspoke during this interview….if you watch pornography you CAN indeed have orgasms. You really can. My apologies. Pornography and orgasms can be lovely things.
There’s little mystery behind a lecture called Fornication 101. But, there is plenty of debate about it at Central Connecticut State University.
A sex educator named Megan Andelloux is giving the lecture, which she tells The Hartford Courant is a “study of how people experience the erotic and express themselves as sexual beings with an emphasis on jollies, attitude awareness, sexual skill building and health.”
Andelloux has talked at dozens of schools, including Yale, Wesleyan and the Universities of Connecticut and said she’s never gotten negative comments about her work before, but she’s been receiving e-mails calling her “disgusting” and that she was contributing to immorality, the Courantreports.
Professors at CCSU are also putting their opinions on a university listerv.
Mark McLaughlin, a spokesman for the university, told the Courant he thinks the negative reaction is based on misconceptions that taxpayer money is being used to pay for the lecture. TheRuthe Boyea Women’s Center on campus and is sponsoring the event, which is paid for with private donations.
The spokesman also thinks people are confusing the lecture with an academic course and that it’s about sex rather than sexuality.
“We feel, despite the provocative title, her presentation really does focus on health, sexual consent, and providing a frank and open, factual presentation designed to appeal to college students,” McLaughlin told the Courant.
POSTED: 5:04 pm EST February 7, 2011
NEW BRITAIN, Conn. — A new controversial sex seminar that could be coming to Central Connecticut State University in New Britain is raising eyebrows. It’s an explicit seminar that’s also offered at a number of other schools in the state.
This one-hour presentation put on by a Rhode Island based sexologist was initially slated to come to campus last week.
Fornication 101 is a seminar that promised to help participants “experience the erotic attitude awareness and sexual skill building.”
“It doesn’t seem to be a bad thing,” said student Ethan Pelletier. “We’re all adults here.”
Many different topics were to be discussed in a steamy sexology seminar slated to come to campus at CCSU before being canceled last week.
Certified sexologist Megan Andelloux, also known as Ms. Sexuality Speaker, tours universities talking about adult sex education.
One concerned woman in Meriden emailed Eyewitness News saying she was appalled her tax dollars would support such an offensive program, but school officials said the program was privately funded.
According to a university official, funds for the $600 presentation would come from private donations given to the Ruthe Boyea Women’s Center in support of its educational mission.
Taxpayer dollars are not used.
Despite the provocative title, the presentation clearly focuses on health, sexual consent and on providing a frank, open, positive and factual presentation designed to appeal to college-age students.
Officials said the seminar hasn’t been re-scheduled, but according to the sex educator’s website, she’ll be on campus in March.
For Immediate Release
Sexuality educators set the record straight: “Talking about sexuality does not increase sexually transmitted infections” despite what non-experts report.
Contact: Megan Andelloux
Contact: Aida Manduley
In yet another attempt to shut down access to quality sex education, South-Eastern New England conservative advocates hit the sex panic button in a multi-state, email and phone campaign to colleges all over New England last week.
On February 3rd and 4th , certified sexuality educator and sexologist Megan Andelloux (AASECT, ACS) received word that numerous colleges and university faculty received a document stating that colleges who brought sex educators such as Ms. Andelloux onto their campuses were linked to the increasing rate of transmission of HIV in RI. Furthermore, among other misleading “facts” that were “cited,” the author of this bulletin claimed that Brown University was facing an HIV crisis, which is false.
Citizens Against Trafficking, the face behind the fear-mongering, spammed numerous local institutions from a University of Rhode Island account with its latest malicious missive that targeted specific individuals as well as Brown University. The author of the letter, Margaret Brooks, an Economics Professor at Bridgewater State, suggested that colleges and universities that host sexuality speakers, including those who are professionally accredited, are partly to blame for the four new cases of HIV which have been diagnosed amongst RI college students this year.
Ms. Andelloux states: “My heart goes out to those students who have recently tested positive for HIV. However, there is no evidence of any link between campus presentations on sexual issues and the spike in HIV cases. Rather, I would suggest that this demonstrates a need for more high-quality sex education to college students.“ It is unclear why people at URI or Citizens Against Trafficking, a coalition to combat all forms of human trafficking, is attempting to stop adults from accessing sexual information from qualified, trained educators. What is certain however, is that this Professor of Economics miscalculated her suggestion that a correlation exists between increased HIV rates in Rhode Island and the type of sex education these speakers provided at Brown University: one that emphasized accurate information, risk-reduction, pleasure, and health.
Barrier methods have been shown by the CDC to reduce the transmission of HIV and other STIs (Sexually Transmitted Infections). Research has shown that when individuals have access to medically-accurate information, are aware of sexual risk reduction methods, and have access to learn about sexual health, the number of infections and transmission of STIs decreases, pain during sex decreases, and condom use increases. The CAT circulated bulletin is blatantly misleading about many issues, and often omits information that is crucial to understanding the full picture of sex education at Brown and in Rhode Island.
Shanna Katz M.Ed, one of the educators listed in the bulletin states, “In today’s world, many people are sexually active without having ever learned about sex itself. Educating adults about how to better communicate with their partner and how to protect themselves physically and emotionally is vital to the health and wellness of our culture. Without this information and skill sets, we are back in the 1950s, with people feeling guilt around sex, and feeling as though their desires are wrong.”
Reid Mihalko states, “In an age where the majority of college-age adults have only experienced federally funded abstinence-only sex education, continue to get their visual cues about sex from mainstream porn, and feel unsafe talking to their parents and school administrators about accurate sexual health information, I am committed to teaching men and women of all ages comprehensive, pragmatic safer sex practices and how to think for themselves when it comes to making the best sex and intimacy choices for them.”
When individuals who do not hold any background in sexuality education speak out in opposition because of their fear or prejudice, society becomes rooted in outdated beliefs and pseudo-science that do injustice to people everywhere. Furthermore, when those individuals personally and publicly attack those devoted to providing sex education with false and misinformed accusations, it not only hurts those who are defamed, but also the community at large.
We ask for an immediate retraction of the vilifying and inaccurate statements made by Ms. Margaret Brooks and Citizens Against Trafficking in their latest newsletter. We also ask that esteemed local universities such as URI and Bridgewater State continue to hold their employees to ethical standards of normal scientific inquiry and require that their faculty hold some modicum of expertise in a field of education before raising the public level of panic over it.
Megan Andelloux is available to answer any questions the press, Margaret Brooks, University of Rhode Island or Citizens Against Trafficking holds. Aida Manduley, the Chair of Brown University’s Sexual Health Education and Empowerment Council and Brown University’s is available to discuss the upcoming Sex Week and sexuality workshops held at Brown University.
Students Gather To Learn About Hot, Safer Sex
Published 13 December 2010
Last Friday, everyone in the Women’s Center clutched what looked like oversized plastic Easter eggs that were not filled with candy. Their workshop leader warned everyone not to open the packages prematurely; they were Tenga eggs, flexible and doughy masturbatory tools, part of a goodie assortment that also included various lubes.
“This isn’t really the appropriate time to break them out,” their workshop leader said. “Now, to get started, if you have a cell phone, please put it on vibrate and stick it between your legs.”
Last Friday, the Women’s Center was overflowing with people trying not to sit on each other, all of them facing a table crowded with brightly colored sex toys and lube. They squeezed into the Smith/Burdick basement for a workshop by Oh Megan!, or MeganAndelloux, a board certified sexologist and nationally certified sex educator who came wielding tools of the trade to educate on “Supersex”: safe sex that’s hot and fun.
Skyler Volpe ’13, a student coordinator of the Women’s Center, said that Andelloux used to come to Conn through the Feminist Majority group, which has since been absorbed by the Women’s Center. “Her presentations were always well attended and widely talked about, so we wanted to bring her back this year,” she said. “She was glad to come back to Conn!”
“She eliminated all potential awkwardness for the audience from the beginning,” said Rachel Saltzman ‘14. “By telling us about herself and her background from the start, we could think of her as a real person and not as this strange sex speaker.”
Andelloux loosened up the crowd by chatting amiably about what led her to our campus. She worked for Planned Parenthood for nine years, but was “burned out by the bad stuff,” like the onslaught of teen pregnancy and STDs. She now wants to teach young adults that there are ways to make safe sex exciting, no matter your gender or sexual orientation.
“I really enjoyed how diplomatic and sexually unbiased she was,” said Alia Roth ’14. Andelloux took the time to explain that she would differentiate between “penis-owners” and “vagina-owners,” but these terms did not imply gender identity or sexual preference.
Her presentation commenced with a plush vulva puppet she named Veronica, the exploration of which allowed the audience to view a cartoonishly large, fluffy replica of the clitoris, the labia and even the G-spot (Stickers exclaiming “The G-spot does exist!” were included in the goodie collections).
Andelloux bluntly explained that “while deep-dicking sounds lovely,” there are more nerve endings towards the front of the vagina, and fewer the deeper one ventures. Additionally, the clitoris is about six inches long, but can get up to eight when stimulated, and is most sensitive in its upper left quadrant.
Sequentially, Andelloux hefted out an alarmingly large and apparently rare uncircumcised dildo to educate about the penis. She explained that circumcision was not the only method originally employed to suppress children’s sexual desires: the blandness of Kellogg’s Corn Flakes and graham crackers were also used. They, as she pointed out, did not work.
Andelloux shared other “fun facts” throughout the presentation, including a few on the penis: length is not as important to vaginal stimulation as girth, the average speed of ejaculation is thirty five miles per hour (though the shots can reach eighty), the scrotum is constantly moving, and (lightly!) pulling down on the sack during foreplay or intercourse, will delay orgasm.
This last one was particularly useful information, because Andelloux then indicated that the average national penis-owner “lasts” about two minutes.
To demonstrate, three volunteers were called to the front of the room and instructed to thrust with invisible partners, persistently.
“You’re doing it wrong!” Andelloux yelled at them as she stood aside, smirking. “You’re not going fast enough! Faster! Ow, you’re hurting me!”
The crowd was atwitter and the volunteers were panting and laughing when she called Time; they had cleared a mere 46 seconds.
Next on the agenda was a discussion of the orgasm, which Andelloux indicated to be very healthy for the body: it lowers stress, helps sleep, can alleviate mild depression, and even allows wounds to heal faster.
She then transitioned into a talk on vibrators, tools originally created as a treatment for hysteria.
“Some people don’t want to use them because they say they want to do it ‘the natural way,’” said Andelloux. “Well, toilets aren’t natural, but they make our lives better.”
Vagina-owners on average take ten to twenty minutes to get off, which means the best way they can achieve orgasm during intercourse is through practice with self-stimulation first. “The G-spot is not like the Staples ‘Easy’ button,” said Andelloux.
The workshop drew to a close after an extensive run-through of sex toys and supplements, from lubes (the water-based kind can increase STI transmission, she cautioned; go with silicon-based instead) to strap-ons (Volpe unabashedly volunteered to wear it as Andelloux demonstrated applying a condom with her mouth) to whips and funky vibrators. A crowd favorite was OhMiBod, a dildo that syncs up with your iPod and vibrates to the beat of the song of your choice.
Andelloux took some questions the audience had written anonymously on note cards. One asked for blowjob and handjob tips. She taught some moves – the ‘bottle-cap’ and the ‘octopus’ among them – but added, “Be confident, and be enthusiastic. You’d be amazed by how far that goes.”
“The center was packed, and people looked genuinely enthusiastic and interested in her presentation,” said Volpe. “It was also really cool to see so many people in the Center. It’s a beautiful space that doesn’t see nearly enough love from the campus community.”
Said Peter Herron ’14, “Andelloux knew exactly what she was doing. I would thoroughly recommend that girls learn from the vast wisdom this amazing woman has to offer. I definitely learned a thing or two myself.” •
Special Note: Water-Based Lubricant DOES NOT INCREASE STI TRANSMISSION. In controlled lab studies (not human based research), certain water-based lubricants damaged cell structures. This is preliminary research. For more information, please see http://www.microbicides2010.org/files/LubesDezzuttiAbstract.pdf
The Wesleyan Argus
By Tess Scriptunas, Staff Writer
Sexologist Megan Andelloux, who has come to campus four years running, is a huge proponent of lube, not so much desensitizing cream.
“Lube is great. I repeat, lube is great,” said Megan Andelloux, emphatically kicking off her annual Sex Toys Workshop in Shanklin Hall last Wednesday. Andelloux, a certified sexuality educator, or “sexologist,” according to her business card, has been coming to Wesleyan for the past four years to speak on the fascinating, controversial, and always exciting topic of sex. While the workshop was largely light-hearted and entertaining, it was in fact sponsored by FemNet—Wesleyan’s Feminist Network—and raised interesting questions about the relationship between sex and feminism.
The workshop covered a broad range of topics, from desensitizing cream to handcuff alternatives to new ways to make use of a vacuum. No matter the topic, Andelloux had a witty comment to explain it.
“Desensitizing cream is the devil, like douching,” she said. “Just remember the three D’s: desensitizing cream, devil, douching. It’s like the Energizer Bunny of lube.”
At the front of the room was a table strewn with toys, which she went through and explained one by one. Andelloux also passed around the toys and had the audience participate in such activities as testing out the vibrators by placing them against their nostrils.
“If it makes you sneeze, it’s too strong,” she explained.
Given its provocative, shocking, and hilarious subject matter, students who attended the workshop had a wide range of responses to it, but on the whole their reactions were very positive, the event ending with raucous applause.
“Clearly it was interesting,” said Alec Harris ’14 with a laugh. “It was shocking at first but I found I got used to it very quickly. It was very lube-heavy.”
Despite the fun and light-hearted tone of the lecture, FemNet did have a slightly more serious purpose in hosting the event. Katie DiBona ’11, president of the group, elaborated on FemNet’s intentions in bringing Andelloux to speak.
“It’s really important to FemNet to bring people to campus who believe in sex positivity and think that sex is about having fun and good communication,” DiBona said. “People who believe in celebrating sex instead of making it into a taboo.”
DiBona described what she sees as the broader relationship between the sexual liberation of women and feminism.
“Men are often seen as the ones whose role it is to be sexual,” she said. “Celebrating women as sexual beings and not viewing their sexuality as something negative or that makes them a slut is really important to feminism and women’s rights.”
Students offered different perspectives on the workshop’s relevance to feminism.
“Most of the toys were catered towards women, and she definitely came off as a strong, independent woman,” said Emma Pattiz ’13. “There were also definitely more women in the audience.”
Another student thought that the feminist focus of the workshop was appropriate due to the long history of sexual oppression of women.
“The lecture was feminist in that Megan focused on consent and pleasure, when sex has been used to oppress women and other marginalized groups for a long time,” said Elizabeth Halprin ’14, a member of FemNet. “I also appreciated that she used terms like penis-owner and vagina-owner, because too often our society conflates biological sex and gender.”
Yet other attendees saw less of an emphasis on feminism in Andelloux’s talk.
“I don’t think it was overbearingly feminist; it was just really based on equality,” said Harris. “In the beginning she said that she doesn’t care who you are, or who you’re doing it with—she just wants sex to be fun. Although from a perspective where women aren’t seen as having as much control in the bedroom, it could have been considered feminist just because it was equalizing.”
However, the negative aspects of linking a sex toys lecture with the causes of feminism were also questioned.
“Sexual empowerment can be a very important tool for women, but you have to examine it critically,” Halprin said. “When women use sex to empower themselves it can continue to promote the idea of them as sexual objects or purely sexual beings,”
DiBona shared similar opinions, but saw the dangers as less relevant.
“It’s definitely a valid opinion; it’s just another way of being a feminist, one that’s not my way,” she said. “There is that danger, but for me what I think is important is to get women—female-bodied people—to feel equipped to combat sexism and paternalism and other forms of oppression by feeling empowered themselves.”
While others expressed concern about whether or not advocates of women’s rights should focus their efforts on educating about sex toys when there are such issues as the condition of women in developing countries or the continued existence of sex-trafficking at hand, DiBona defended the importance of the workshop.
“You can’t create hierarchies of issues,” DiBona said. “Who’s to say what is more important or what type of oppression is worse? There is no one way of being a feminist, so when people are participating in feminist activism it’s really about what parts of feminism are most relevant to them and that they think are important to put their time and efforts into. Sex positivity and good communication in sex are really important to me, so that’s why I put my efforts in this direction.”
Students tended to agree that such workshops were an important and essential contribution to feminism.
“I think it’s important to demystify sex, because our society is pretty Puritanical, and so the more opportunities that everyone has to find out about sex the better,” Halprin said.
Pattiz agreed that the sex-toy workshop is part of a continuum of the feminist movement.
“I mean, when you compare it to giving microloans to women in third world countries, it’s like, what the hell are we doing?” Pattiz said. “But women’s sexual liberation has been an important part of the feminist movement for a long time, and sex toys are a relatively new outlet for expressing that liberation. A workshop on sex toys is a light-hearted approach to making people feel comfortable about women’s sexuality.”
Megan Andelloux, who will be landing the magical Sex Education Jet on Wesleyan’s tarmac tomorrow night.
The fabulously intelligent, friendly, open-minded, beautiful Megan Andelloux will be gracing Wesleyan with her fierce presence this Wednesday. It will be more than worth your hour and a half. From her website:
Sex toys. Alone or with a companion, sex toys give the possibility of enhancing and widening your sexual landscape. But where to start?! The choices can be overwhelming and leave a person breathless from the sheer volume of options.
Sassy, and sex-positive Megan Andelloux is a Certified Sexuality Educator. She will be be leading this workshop about the joys of sex toy play, how to incorporate them into your sex life and give you straightforward and honest information about each item’s best use, shelf life, and more… to help YOU figure out what would work best for YOUR playtime, be it with yourself or with others!
Date: Wednesday, November 3rd
Time: 8:30 – 10 pm
Place: Shanklin 107
Level of Awesomeness: Extremely high
Whatever your awkward questions, if you’re a sex nerd, or if you’re trying educate yourself while avoiding homework… between Megan’s videos and her workshop on sex toys tomorrow night, you should be set. Below is her first video, in which she answers a question about putting starbusts in a vagina (and answers seriously, respectfully, and scientifically, at that).
Reposted from Fearless Press
Sat, Oct 16, 2010
by Megan Andelloux
Hopping into a cab to catch a train into New York, I noticed a post on the cab driver’s dashboard that stated “Remember, God is in Control”. I braced myself for it…and yes, it came. “Do you love Jesus?”
Ugh. This was not the cab in which I wanted to be.
My driver spoke to me about God’s love and the blessings he had received in the past week. He told me about how tough life is, but that God has a plan for us all.
Most likely due to the silence he was receiving on my end, resulting from my complete lack of interest in the conversation, he changed topics. He posed the question: “Do you have a job?” I replied, “Yes, I own my own business.” He seemed excited and asked me what I did for work. And, I said it folks, I told the religious cab driver that I worked as a sexuality educator.
There was silence. Clearly he was not expecting this answer. It’s understandable, most people don’t, and every day I make a conscious decision to disclose my line of work. Why shouldn’t I? I’ have pride in what I do, and I’m happy to show people the variety of career choices available to them.
He nodded his head and asked if I had heard about that “boy who killed himself” after photos of him were released of him kissing another man. I informed him that I had, and then the conversation took a swooping downward turn.
He stated, “Now, it’s unfortunate that he died, and those kids should be arrested for what they did, but it wasn’t the publishing the pictures that caused him to die. It was pride. He should’ve just repented to God, asked for his forgiveness, and made an oath that he would never….. to read more, visit Fearless Press HERE
Published: Thursday, October 14, 2010
Updated: Thursday, October 14, 2010 06:10
Sex is BIG. It’s big, and it’s everywhere. The media is saturated with sex. It floods the forums on the website College ACB at Tufts, the cast members of “ Jersey Shore” have an entire room dedicated to “smushing,” and on−camera teen moms juggle jobs, schoolwork and screaming babies in the background (a big slap−in−the−face reminder to use protection). It’s on our minds constantly: Girls think about it all the time (…right?), and guys definitely do (if I’m ever questioning this, I simply tune in to the constant conversations of my two male roommates talking about the “bangable” girls they see at the gym). Apparently we Tufts students are so sexually charged that the administration had to lay down the law with some dorm room policies last year. If you’ve resorted to the sketchy scenario of sex a few feet away from a “sleeping” roommate, dear God, read on, and hopefully you’ve been able to think of some creative solutions since then. Even if you’re not actively doing the deed — because of misfortune or personal choice — don’t skip ahead to the Sudoku puzzle just yet. Let’s be honest, reading this is probably a lot more fun than Sudoku.
Sex is all over the place, but ironically, this extremely “out there” topic can cause a lot of people to close up in conversation. Unless I’m lounging around with a couple of close friends, a few drinks in, I’ll admit that sex can feel like a bit of a taboo topic.
Thankfully, I have a pretty open relationship with my roommates. If I ever need to figure out the dos and don’ts of sexual relationships with guys, I can generate some laughingly awkward conversation and get all my questions answered right away. But not all of us can (or want to) be this lucky with housemates. So I propose a sex talk revolution of sorts. I’m tired of trying to turn to Cosmopolitan for sex advice: I don’t want to know 50 great things to do with my breasts. I propose real conversation. Be talkative in the classroom (if the course is appropriate for that), and most importantly, be talkative in the bedroom. Even if you’re drunkenly wobbling back to Wren Hall with a potential hook−up in tow, attempt some real talk. Communicating your desires and asserting what you want will likely lead to an even better sexual experience than will a somewhat silent, awkward encounter, perforated by the creaking of the dorm bed and a few of those weird, uncomfortable noises.
In the interest of full disclosure and of this proposed sex talk revolution, I want to take this space to talk about the female orgasm. Of course, there are plenty more topics I could approach, but I feel as if women have been socialized to believe their sexual needs and desires are less important than those of their partners. Often there seems to be a bit of a sexual double standard. Women are expected to please their partner, with little expectation of reciprocation. Or, when a guy orgasms, sex is over. Maybe I’ve been getting with the wrong guys, but there’s nothing more frustrating. Now, my attempt to debunk some orgasm myths: Myth: Female orgasms are always these huge earth−shattering events, a la the diner scene in “When Harry Met Sally.” Fact: You do not need to have what she was having. Some women have orgasms and don’t even know it. This “peak of arousal” can feel differently for every woman and can occur in different ways. Myth: If you’re not having an orgasm through intercourse, you’re probably not normal. Fact: Nah! Many women claim to not be able to have an orgasm through penetration alone. In general, many women need direct stimulation of the clitoris to reach climax. The act of penetration sometimes leaves a woman’s clitoris entirely neglected. That’s no fun. Myth: It takes women a crazy−long time to reach orgasm. Fact: The duration of time between the prime point of arousal and the actual orgasm is about the same for women and men. The thing is, it takes women longer to reach this peak of arousal. Let’s stop making foreplay a “thing” and just have it be an actual part of the “play,” not an added−on special. One of my ex−boyfriends made it his personal quest to get me to orgasm, like it was a puzzle he was trying to crack. It pretty much killed it for me. That’s a no−no.
If you can’t make yourself orgasm, it doesn’t mean you just can’t — unless you have a medical condition, which is not very common. It’s different for everyone, so it might take some time figuring out what works for you.
Receiving pleasure is pretty good, but remember, you’re not the only one in the bed (or closet or laundry room or shower). Sex shouldn’t be selfish — unless your sexual kinks denote otherwise — but even so, everyone involved in the sex act should be cool with what’s going on. After all, it takes two (or three or four) to tango.
After imparting all this perhaps too personal advice, I can’t help but make a shameless plug. Tufts VOX is hosting an event with sexologist Megan Andelloux today at 51 Winthrop Ave. called “Oh Ohh OH: Sexual Pleasure with OhMegan.” In this fun, interactive workshop, she’ll explore Cosmo’s promises of sexual satisfaction, finger fun, G−spot play, the female orgasm and much more. Most importantly, Megan will make that awkward conversation a little easier so that sex is safe and fun for everyone involved. You’ll also leave with tons of free sexual goodies in hand for a fun Thursday night. Are you gonna come?
This week we caught up with certified sexuality educator and ACS board certified Sexologist, Megan Andelloux to ask her probing questions on love, life and the prostate…
1. Hey Megan, you look like a rather wholesome lady, what prompted you to become a Sexologist?
Chuckle…this question makes me laugh. Aren’t we all wholesome?!
During college, I found I had a knack for memorizing sexual facts. Every night at supper, I would amaze and intrigue friends at the table with my “fact of the day”. I loved spreading factual knowledge, piquing my friends’ interests, and confronting the taboo topic (sex) all at once. As it was coming from a lady who was raised with manners and properness, it became even more titillating. I reveled in the fact that I was talking about something everyone wanted to know about, but few seemed to have the courage to do.
Becoming a sexologist was not a career choice I had ever heard of a woman taking on and so along with providing education and reducing fear and shame, it was a way for me to challenge the gender roles I was expected to engage in.
My mother always called me a “Contrarian”, saying “When someone says don’t, you do.” Sex is such biological drive, a natural function and an endless source of curiosity, yet so much shame surrounds it for many folks. Talking about sexuality openly is a way for me to model that there is power talking openly and honestly and it can be done with class and yes, even for the prim and proper like me.
2. Where are you based? Do you have any plans to come to the UK?
I am based out of the US in New England – Rhode Island to be exact. There, I run a sexuality resource center called The Center for Sexual Pleasure and Health, in addition to travelling across the states to provide sex education to students, professionals, medical schools and sex toys shops.This year I am releasing a new sex education project, The Study Sex Tour, which will be taking in the States. I plan on bringing The Study Sex Tour to the UK next year!
3. What are the most common issues you come across during your workshops and counselling?
The most common question I come across is concern or fear, which is what causes me to continue working in the field of sexuality education. Due to the lack of information received regarding sexuality, bodily reactions, fantasies and desires, many people think they aren’t normal or something is wrong, when in fact, their bodies and minds are usually operating on a healthy level. It’s heartbreaking to hear people discuss the shame, the embarrassment and the concern they hold within themselves due to the lack of frank, honest, medically accurate information.
I work everyday to dispel fears, myths and trust, appreciation of the body and excitement for consensual sexual play. Sex is healthy! Sex is fun! Sex should be rejoiced!
4. As you know, we are all about the male G-Spot here at Nexus. Whilst everyone is very much aware of the female G-spot, the male equivalent is shrouded in mystery and taboo. Would you mind explaining to our dear readers what it’s all about?
I’m a huge advocate for discovering the Prostate! Prostates should be loved, because often the few times we hear about it is because of cancer. They offer so much more than just bad feelings. In fact, stimulating the prostate is very healthy and enjoyable!
5. What can men do to enjoy this little gland?
If a male chooses to explore his prostate, there are a number of ways that he can stimulate it. Fingers (fun, free and always accessible!) can fit in tight spots and be a way to build intimacy between partners. Using the finger in a “ringing the doorbell” motion works beautifully, just remember to go slow! Don’t “ring the doorbell” like you’re anxious to use the bathroom, but maybe in a way that is tentative, build the excitement, make him want it, crave your touch.
Toys can also be used, look for items that are curved, as the prostate gland is located towards the front of the tummy, so all toys should have a curvature design to them. Some men prefer the toy to gently rest on the prostate, some prefer it to wiggle around a bit on the prostate and others prefer a vibration to be part of their prostate stimulation.
When stimulating the prostate gland, remember to always use good lube, to go slow, and to make sure the toy has a flared base, also known as a flange, on it.
6. If you enjoy prostate stimulation, does that make you …… to read more click HERE